“Fall seven times, stand up eight.”

My attitude , just like anyone else would be distinctive in different circumstances.

But when a health related calamity stuck my daughter, it over engulfed me.

It was like a stereotypical repetition of my own fitness conditions. It is almost impossible to transcend the laws of nature, but then in that given setting ,  I had to find a solution, not just concerning my daughter’s health but also bring peace to my psyche.

I had survived things that were worse than what I was going through now and I knew that if I had survived my past , nothing or no one could stop me. I had to be stronger than what I thought myself to be.

I had an opportunity to take control of my life by the decisions I made.

I had been a follower of Buddhist philosophy for the past some years and the only quick fix to my daughter’s agony seemed to lie in relying on my deep faith towards my Buddhist practice. So I started to chant to bring out the best in her, trying to banish the negative forces that were trying to traumatize her. Taking responsibility of being a mother gave me the power to be exactly where I wanted to be.  I had to figure out what I needed to do to cope with tough times. I was not going to let any troubles knock me down.

Realizing that I could not face this issue alone , I decided to be upfront with friends and colleagues about what I was going through. My friends knew that  I had managed to push through hard times, and they were much more willing to put their necks out for me to help me thrive. Together we chanted sending strong energy forces towards my daughter. Since chiIdhood I had been taught the power of combined prayers and the reports of my daughter, although not exactly perfect ,saved her from many more complexities.

I had learnt to trust those who helped to relieve the gloom of my dark hours than those who are so ready to enjoy with me the sunshine of my prosperity.”

 “anything that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” really did ring true !

Taapsi and Mark, on your 3rd Wedding Anniversary !

On your third wedding anniversary, I wish you and Mark, a lifetime of joyous moments and memories that you both can treasure forever!

It has been my great joy to watch you grow from a young girl into a gorgeous and marvelous woman. And today on your anniversary, I wish you both a life full of wonderful experiences that are wrapped in love.

That was a special day when you were born. I have watched you step by step on your journey, from your first clumsy steps as a bubbly baby to the alluring young bride walking down the aisle and into the arms of your love. I am overwhelmed by  your accomplishments followed by successes. I wish you and Mark many more adventurous walks together, joined arm in arm in love for eternity.

Snowfall may be distressing, but then comes the spring. Summers may be hot and humid but then you see the radiance of colors in the fall. At times life will be dingy and drab but then you have to have the perseverance to see it sparkle and radiate. I am confident that together you  both will confront the challenges that will come your way . Mark, the more I got to know you, your quintessential qualities got to be more highlighted. I am so glad to have you as my son in law.

“Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the Independence is equal, the Dependence mutual and the Obligation reciprocal”.

You both are fortunate to have each other as your lifetime partners.

तापसी, तुम फ़िर उसी अदा से अंगड़ाईयाँ लेकर हँस दो ,

मार्क को पलट कर याद आएगा गुज़रा हुआ ज़माना ॥ 

New exposure/ Newer experiences !

My first time ever ,also happened as soon as me and my kids

parted company.
My connecting flight between the two islands taking me to Toronto got delayed. Can't say whether it was the lazy eyes of the Tobago islanders, or their casual approach (I don't see any negativity in them, with their ever winkle smile) that I reached Trinidad in the middle of night ,only to know that my next flight was 12 hrs later.
Trinidadian camaraderie made sure, I am put up in a hotel close by the airport , sensitively pampering me, as they realized that I was stuck in their country due to their laxity.....no,no... oversight ,a small error.
Awaiting my onward flight to Toronto , with a ciao to my son Aakarsh Ramchandani (already at his desk in New York), and daughter Taapsi Ramchandani( on her research field work in Trinidad).
Islanders of this T&T country, despite all this, I am not chickening out
 

Just listening to BBC that Delta Airlines of US has been grounded due to operational problems, then for my Caribbean Airlines ,this was a speck in the ocean.
Neelam Ramchandani will return with her complete family !

Complexities and Simplifications

Being a singleton for a decade has not been an easy ride.

At times I felt like a sadcase, then an utter fool with a feel that I am getting used by myself.

My numero uno   personality was like vanishing from sight.

Then came a brainy equation wrong*wrong = right . But then I was doing the right things trying to sort out my perplexed life?

Life was quiet ,  yet  pleasant and then was this influx as if everything was happening all at once.

I don’t believe in pretence, so I knew I had to lift my ship’s sails before it sank.

I had to muster that strength to believe that everything will be alright.

So I decided to change my life by changing my thinking that I am a wonderful, capable being able to discharge my responsibilities .

I believed that tomorrow would be another day and I would have a tireless temper to simplify my life by reducing my scales  ,  yet keeping my comfort zones and eliminating the complexities.

Now my equation had changed to maximum output with optimal effort.

Resolution 2016--- Decisive and Positive thinking !

I realized that when my inner faculties are robust and cohesive, I let go of those ludicrous thoughts , don’t act on those which are deceptive and I switch my mind’s platform to rest only on the beneficial and the salubrious ones.

Welcome 2016 !

Had read somewhere that our body has reserve cells that will replace or heal anything that our attention is focussed on and so a negative belief can hurt or kill as much as positive emotions can heal and revive. “ Inarguably , so easily written than done.”

Now, I am one who has turned a HEN , meaning Happy Empty Nester who has taken this new freedom, without any more dabbas to be packed or those pickup and drops to the crèche with routine follow ups on my kids homework.

I took this new avatar as a rite of passage, one which enabled me to follow my passions which had been involuntarily blocked for a while.

I take solace from the fact that we have social media now, the Hangouts , the Skype and various other medium to communicate with my loved ones. We all know that nothing helps fill vacuum like the sliding chair outraging on Facebook or watching a belligerent Saas arguing with her Bahu on popular soaps.

I get a hint of my existential life when I get trapped beneath the layers of self inflicted over sized emotions and then my whole system works in a tangent. It is then that the words ‘positivity’ gives me some perspective and my indomitable human spirit triumphs to ease out that feeling of depletedness.

Life, it seems does not follow the path of our desires and strategies as much as that of our intentions and beliefs. To know and and accept what I desire of 2016 , attracts the same reality in me. Today I say ”I have to just be myself.”

I have to let go. 

An Exhaustive Liberation !

It is enough for me by day ,
To walk under the same bright glare ; 

When soon by night, the roof of stars,

Binds me like a canopy of immense motherly care.

I do not hope to bind the wind --
Or repress the tide of the sea -- 
It is just that, at this juncture of my life,
Let happiness blow by like music over me.”

Those moments of bliss and glee,
Let them stay ,even for just a while,

The charisma of Life, I never wish to flee-

Let me stay as the Lily of the Nile.

Leaving behind the great elements of comfort

At the end of the day, I hope to become the person,

Who can laugh in the face of adversity,

Nothing to make my wholesome smile crackle.

Merrily taking the road less travelled,

I shall wait for my Karma’s mystery to unravel !

An Ode to my Father !

Memories of my father will never fade, they will tug at me from time to time. Some cherished memories of him , I share here :

He was a perfectionist, in whatever task he undertook. He taught me to fold a simple page in such a way so that none of the corners protruded out unevenly.

Dad kept a lamp next to his bed not so much for reading, but to fix a fallen screw out of spectacles  with the tiniest screwdriver.

Today , I playback very memorable incidents from my childhood where in his extended family ,he was nicknamed ‘ Dande Wale Uncle ‘ as he wielded an army baton. His one call meant, we had to give an abrupt answer and get ready to fulfil the task assigned to us.

From that stern man in his youth, he mellowed down to be a man having the most amiable and adaptable heart.

To me, his daughter, he was receptive and responsible for finding ready solutions to any of the most perplexed problems, pondering over it and finding a ready solution with alacrity. On the other hand, he respected my choices and viewpoints too and accepted them if he thought them to be a good suggestion.

In my need to write at this time, I know his memories will always be beautifully woven into the depth of my life and it was his one dream that all his children and grandchildren should live up to their fullest potential.

My dad always said that money and material things may be important, but love towards family was what created and sustained happiness.

I love you, Dad !